10 Things a Husband Can Do While The Wife is Pregnant

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While thinking of an article to write, I found this draft in my inbox which I started when Cali was pregnant with Cassandra. Hopefully rookie dads like me would be able to use these tips:

Like I said before, you can never graduate on being a rookie dad.  Each baby is different and since they are different, mom’s pregnancies vary as well :).

Here are ten things a rookie husband can do when their wife is pregnant:

  1. Give in to her cravings.  Carrioca, bananaque, pichi-pichi, freshly picked green mango with freshly cooked bagoong (shrimp paste), cassava.  Whether they’re available in the grocery or at the most inconvenient place and time, do your best to get them.  And if you’re not able to find them, put your armor on before you go home. 🙂
  2. Understand the hormonal imbalance.  There will be times that even if you’re too conscious on making sure that everything is working as it should be, she’ll still feel terrible and that you’ll be her target to vent off those emotional anger fangs.  It’s not your fault.  It’s just that biology takes the most out of her. 
  3. Be as Christian as possible. One of the best advise I heard from older couples who never had a very big fight was: Always be kind to each other.  Mastery of one’s emotions is one of the best strength that can bring you a long way. 
  4. Be extra caring.  If you got spoiled by your wife where she prepares everything from your breakfast or even clothes to wear to the office, it’s our turn to do these little things for them.
  5. Help in your household chores.  Enough with the excuses that we’re so tired at the office (even if we’re just doing FB the whole day 😉 just kidding), It’s time to do your share, do the laundry, cook the meals, cleanup your mess. 
  6. Go home early.  Well for workaholic dads, nothing is more important than the family right?  If you can’t get out of the early… it’s either, we’re not working smarter or our boss is not working much smarter than we are.  But, no matter what, always remember why we’re working in the first place.  It’s for our family.  And if our family is suffering because we’re not there physically, it’s time to examine what our primary motivation for work is.  Is it really for the family?  Or for our ego?
  7. Make things orderly.  As there are hormonal imbalance going on, seeing messy things might mess up your life as well.  Take the extra effort that before leaving any place in your house that everything is neat.  Books on the bookshelf. DVDs in their cases and stored in the shelf.  Left over food, if you plan to eat them in the morning should be stored in the ref and in the proper container.  
  8. Go on dates.  Make sure to continue your weekly dates to keep the communication lines open.  The best secret to a good marriage is being able to exchange stories with one another. Treat her on a fancy or even in a not so fancy turo turo.  As long as the food is safe and the venue allows you to talk to one another, it will be enough.
  9. Always remind her she’s beautiful.  Remember, beauty is not about figure.  Well round is a figure 🙂  Even if she’s well rounded, always make her feel she’s the most beautiful girl in the world by always saying it to her.
  10. Always be there.  No matter what activities you plan to do to make her feel happy… it won’t matter unless you are there physically beside her.  Even if you’re the most busiest man alive in the world, nothing would be more important as having to spend your time with your wife most especially in her trying moments when she’s experiencing new things in her tummy and her body.  Be there with her not just physically but mentally as well.

The Weekend School

They say that in school, you’ll learn how to write, read, draw and other technical stuff.  Last weekend was full of new things to learn for me.

Man’s Time vs. God’s Time
Week after week, we’re so good at filling up our schedule to the brim. There were cases were we put event coverage, photobooth service, attending birthday parties, family gathering and serving through CFC all in one day.  We’re so addicted on being busy to the point that at the end of the day, when we look back at the things we’ve done, everything seemed to be mediocre. That things were done out of compliance and not aligned to what we were designed to do.

God took charge and made us stick to what is important.  Amanda got sick so we went to the Asian Hospital super early morning which is much earlier than the activity we’re suppose to go to. Instead of going through a lot of activities for that day, we spent it with the kids.  That afternoon, we visited lola at the heritage to check out if our solar lamp really works, and then went to my cousin for Cassandra’s shot.

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Champee at the emergency room. Good thing the high fever went down after a quick sponge bath.

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Champee checking Lola’s solar lights.

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Cassie on serious mode before her vaccine.

God’s Engineering
During our visit to Dr. Robles, my cousin and both of my kids’ pedia, she told us on how a woman’s body adapts to the needs of her baby.  Did you know that the breastmilk that moms produce contains the exact amount of vitamins and nutrients that her baby needs?  Like whey and casein proteins.  The right balance of these two substances make it easier for a baby to digest thus increasing her ability to resist infections. Formula milk tries to mimic these combination that’s why you can see different types based on an infant’s age.

Same Sex Marriage
This was also the same weekend were Same Sex Marriage was legalized in the US.  I would have to agree with Pope Francis’ view that this is cohabitation rather than marriage and family life.  A family needs balance and by God’s engineering, men and women although different, complement each other’s existence.  And that these different roles are important to raise kids who will be the future of the society.